The 3 A’s to Thrive Now (Part 1)
I can humbly say that I have done fairly ok these past few weeks with my own highs/ lows and a few bad days but mostly good ones. I have been fortunate to have connected and re-connected with many of my family and friends lately (some of whom I hadn’t spoken in years with) and in talking to everyone around me, I have found that each of us is dealing with the current, one-of-its-kind situation, in our own very different yet similar ways. I observed a few common themes among most people who are doing alright or these themes missing among those who are still finding their way around.
I have found that trying to shift my mindset from “How I can survive” to “How I can thrive” to be incredibly helpful and I am hoping to share this way of thinking with all of you in this article.
While there are things we all need to do to simply survive but as we begin to master those, we tread towards changing our mindsets in adapting to these times to say, “I choose to Thrive”. Adaptation is the final step in a 3 stage journey, the first of which begins with:
1. Acceptance- I believe that the first base is to accept the current situation, this new “surreal” normal. Sometimes all we need is just acceptance of a situation. Simple acceptance empowers us and the struggle falls away.
In denial, we tend to pull ourselves down to something undesirable but in acceptance, we raise ourselves up to take things in stride. This then opens up our minds and we lose the fear of the unknown as we think of the various possibilities that lie ahead of us — freedom, happiness, clarity, and solutions.
Acceptance = Alleviating your anxiety.
Knowing that we are not the only ones, not alone in this and that “This too shall pass”. Just like in our history books, we talk about A.D. (After Death) and B.C (Before Christ), we will be talking about A.C (After-COVID) in the times to come and all the current concerns/ dilemmas/ anxiety will seem trivial looking back at it.
While some of us are faced with some serious challenges which may be a blocker towards ‘acceptance’, like juggling between work-from-home and home-schooling, taking care of kids/ sick family members, financial planning/ distress or some even with losing their jobs. Hence, it is important to analyze/identify what’s blocking us from developing acceptance. It is surely not unnatural to feel anxious but it is also natural to train ourselves out of it.
2. Adopting a flexible mindset — After we come into acceptance with ourselves and the situation, embracing the ‘new ways’ of doing things which we were used to doing in a certain way is the next important step. This realization came upon me when as a part-time DJ, I was discussing an idea of co-hosting a ‘Virtual Disco Night’ with a friend.
I realized it took so much thought, discussion, convincing, and the need to ‘ditch our rigid mindset’, the mindset which is so used to ‘only one way’ of doing some activities. And when we did ditch our rigid mind-set and let ourselves believe into something totally new, it led to one of the best things — that knowing, yes, it was actually a possibility and a good one!
Adopting a flexible mindset = Discovering new possibilities
The Virtual Disco Night spread joy to 40 odd families including our own and continues to be a new fun way of sharing our common passion for dance, music, and letting our hair down!
3. Adapting: This is the final step in the journey towards thriving. The need for adaptability has never been greater than it is now, and we humans have this unique ability to adapt to our environment. It is amazing to see how many of us have quickly adapted in innumerous ways — business moved to virtual modus operandi, fitness instructors switched to online platforms, schools/colleges are educating through virtual classrooms; this can be an endless list.
With #1 and #2 done right, #3 can be a breeze. This then simply means adapting to newer ways of your older habits/hobbies — whether it is as big as hosting a ‘Virtual’ Conference or something more casual as a ‘Virtual’ Happy Hour or a ‘Zoom’ba or a ‘Distant Game Night’ or even coming together with your quarantined loved ones to virtually celebrating occasions.
Adapting = Creatively Thriving
Every single individual I know who has adapted well during this time is now finding creative ways and the time to pursue their hobbies/ passion that they have always wanted to. So, if we come to think about it, COVID-19 has given us a lot to be thankful for too. Only if we adapt to the new and the ‘Virtual’ ways of doing things, would we come out so much stronger.
Would like to leave with a few questions to think about that helped to overcome some of my own fears:
- What is my biggest fear/concern right now?
- What is within my control and what can I do to mitigate it?
- What are things that I am thankful for right now?
- Can I do anything that will be useful to others?
While it may not seem natural at first, adaptation is a trait that can be learned. If we are open to change and open to inspiration from those around us we can not only adapt but help those around us adapt quickly too.
Stay tuned for more on this. [Part 2- The 3 Ms to Thrive now]